“How are you doing?” That’s a question caregivers are asked all too infrequently. 

While it’s a simple question to ask, people often focus on the one receiving care, not the one giving it. Yet caregivers’ well-being is as important as those they’re caring for. It’s similar to flight attendants’ caution to “put on your own oxygen mask first, before helping others.” Often it falls to caregivers themselves to take steps to prevent their own burnout. 

One in five U.S. adults serve as caregivers to family members or friends with chronic health conditions or disabilities, and more than 60% experience symptoms of burnout.

That’s where respite care can help.

What is Respite Care?

Simply put, respite care provides some “time off” for the caregiver. A much needed “respite” from some of their responsibilities. Depending on individual circumstances, the type of respite care can vary.

A common form of respite care for in-home caregivers is when their loved one moves into a senior living community or health care center for a certain period of time. That could be for a few days, a week or even longer if the caregiver needs to take a vacation and recharge. 

Assisted living communities typically charge daily fees for respite care and offer the same kinds of services and activities that their permanent residents enjoy.

If shorter or periodic breaks are needed, adult day services or home nursing services may be perfect options. Adult day services are often located in senior living communities. Home care providers also offer respite services for shorter periods of time, which can include occasional half- or full-day care, a week at a time or custom services based on the caregiver’s needs.

Having someone come in two times a week, like on Tuesdays and Thursdays, is a common choice. This generally provides caregivers enough time to regroup, take care of their own personal needs and relax.

Emergency respite services are also available when unexpected situations come up. If you experience a sudden illness, family emergency or urgent need for support, many communities can accommodate last-minute requests when space is available.

When is Respite Care the Best Choice?

Every situation is unique, but in all cases, it’s important to consider the best interest of caregivers as well as those being cared for. Here are some of the most common situations where respite care may well be the best option.

In-Home Assistance

Your loved one may need help at home with daily activities like bathing, dressing, cooking or even household tasks like vacuuming, laundry or grocery shopping. But when you can’t be there due to work commitments, family responsibilities or a much-needed vacation, in-home respite care services can provide the support your loved one needs as well as peace of mind.

Adult Day Programs

Sometimes in-home respite care may not cover all of your loved one’s needs. Or it may be that your loved one’s quality of life would be enhanced by having more social contact. These are both situations where senior day care can be a perfect solution. 

Adult day programs vary, but many provide some medical assistance, such as medication management or moderate exercise programs. They all provide activities and social interactions as well as reassurance for you, knowing your loved one is well cared for when you can’t be there.

Care Following Illness, Injury or Surgery

If your loved one is recovering from an illness, injury or surgery, he or she may have additional care needs. Especially if those needs are more demanding or complex than you’re used to, it may well be an appropriate time for your loved one to receive professional care. The options are varied and include care in a rehabilitation center, at an adult day care or in a senior living community that offers medical support.

For loved ones with complex medical needs such as wound care, intravenous therapy or post-surgical recovery, skilled nursing communities offer short-term respite care with nursing support. Knowing what to pack for skilled care can help you prepare if a short-term stay is needed.

Support at End of Life

The end of life is a time when specialized care may be required. A broad range of services includes pain and symptom management and faith-based support. Respite care services can also be provided at this time to support family caregivers and can be provided at home or at a senior living or skilled care community.

Preventing Caregiver Burnout

You don't need to wait for an emergency to use respite care. Preventive respite and taking regular breaks before you feel overwhelmed, is one of the best ways to maintain your own health and provide better care over the long term. 

Regular respite also helps reduce stress, improve family relationships and can even decrease the likelihood of your loved one requiring emergency hospitalization.

Advantages of Respite Care

Caregiving can be demanding, so much so that it’s common for caregivers to forget they need downtime, too. If you’re not yet convinced that respite care would be helpful, consider the benefits that “RESPITE” could spell out for you:

Rest and Relaxation: Take time to enjoy the things that you find relaxing. Perhaps that means taking a walk, visiting a museum or leaving town. These simple activities can help calm your body, lower heart rate and blood pressure and improve your overall mood. Doing so will mean you’ll return to caregiving responsibilities feeling refreshed and renewed.

Energy: Part of the reason to rest and renew is to recharge your battery. In general, a person can’t be effective running on empty.

Space: Just taking a break from the physical space where you provide care can help you see challenges in a new light. It may not take very long, either. A few hours ( sometimes even a few minutes) can help. Get outside, visit a friend or plan a weekend getaway.

Pleasure: Sometimes caregivers can forget that they need to enjoy life on their own terms. Treat yourself to a massage, dinner with a friend or some personal shopping. Remember, caring for yourself isn't selfish, it's necessary for sustainable caregiving.

Identity: It’s important not to get lost in your role as caregiver. You’re more than a caregiver, and you have a right to celebrate all the parts of your own life that bring you joy and comfort.

Time: The time you spend away from caregiving responsibilities may help you see things differently and identify creative ways to handle daily challenges. Time away will help you develop a new perspective.

Engagement: It’s important to stay engaged with friends and family. It’s not only a time to relax, but it can be the perfect time to share with other family and friends your answer to that question: “How are you doing?”

Whatever circumstances you and your loved one are facing, it’s important to remember that respite care is about both of you and that respecting your own needs is as important as respecting those of your loved one.